On Writing and Publishing: How Does it Feel to be a Published Author?

My writing chair.

WILL YOU EVER PUBLISH?

During my life as a writer, my family and friends have gone through different stages just like I have moved from one stage to another in the writing world.

I began writing when I was seventeen years old, and at first, I would use pencil and paper. When people saw me writing, they would ask what I was doing and what I was writing about. Then, the question would always come: will you ever publish your stories?


If you’re a writer, like me, how often have you heard this question?


It was 1995, and although it was always my dream to publish what I wrote,  it felt pretty much impossible.

Of course, a few years later, people began publishing on Amazon. Their books were now easily uploaded to read on kindles. Although the option was there, it still felt very far away.

And then… I published. Twenty-two years later.

HOW DID YOU DO IT?

I haven’t been a published author for long. It all began in February 2017. I decided to just do it. I reviewed my first book many, many times (although I would still release many other editions while I learned how to do it right) and uploaded it to Amazon.

My friends and family turned from, will you publish to how did you do it?

At first, I didn’t know how complex the independent publishing world was and started by saying it hadn’t been hard and anyone could do it. And anyone could, technically. What was hard was to do it right, and that involved spending a lot of money. Most people don’t do this.

Like most authors out there, I got the I always wanted to write/publish a book, would you teach me? I always say yes (I mean, I love talking about this stuff), but no one really means it.

Later, when I learned more about what it actually entailed to be published and for people to WANT to read your books. By then, people would ask if I was famous now or if I was having a book signing. So, I began to say it was easy to publish, what was hard was to get people to read my books.

I got a lot of blank looks.

HOW DOES IT FEEL TO BE A PUBLISHED AUTHOR?

To be honest, no one had ever asked me this before. I wasn’t ready

I went to a family gathering a few weeks ago, and one of my sisters-in-law asked me this question. She isn’t a reader, and has seldom asked anything about my writing, but as I took my other sister-in-law a new edition of the paperbacks (she had bought the first edition and I wanted to surprise her with the new one), she looked at me and asked the question: how does it feel to be a published author?


I suddenly didn’t know what to say.

I wanted to say great, but I really didn’t feel that way. Or at least, it wasn’t that simple.

For some reason, I started thinking and the first thing that came to mind was that it was scary. It was scary because you put yourself out there and a lot of people will say you don’t have what it takes. You’re putting your soul out there to be criticized and torn into pieces.

But then, I began to think about my other feelings. I feel anxious every time I release a new book or pay for a newsletter promo. I get anxious every time I see I have a new review. I get anxious because what if people realize I’m an impostor?

And finally, I told her that it made me feel like a brave person and that felt good. It felt good to do something I wanted, something I felt proud of, and to have the guts to do put it out there. I told her that finally, people I didn’t know were reading my books, and most of them liked them. I told her how hard it was to get people to read my books and how I enjoyed my hard work, anyway. But I also told her that I didn’t make a lot of money on it.

Then she asked: But, it’s just a hobby right?


I swallowed hard and I had to say: yes.

I wonder if my answer will ever change.

cheers!